Creative writing: Maybe you’re born with it, maybe it comes to you in a dream, or maybe, like us, you’re lucky enough to have a former-journalist Chairman with more than thirty years of PR experience and a few books under his belt who doesn’t mind imparting some killer pointers.

Whichever the case, quality writing is an extremely valuable skill that can make even the dullest of press releases sparkle. Once honed, it can elevate copy and capture an audience’s imagination. But it isn’t just to look pretty. Creative writing drives business outcomes and makes your brand voice less Joe Pasquale and more Frank Sinatra.

Here at Aspectus we understand the importance of creativity. So we’ve been working together to help flex our literary muscles and sharpen our tongues. We were set one challenge: Create a persuasive piece of copy. Any topic, any form, just one rule, it has to persuade.

Set loose at our desks and challenge in mind we carved tales of socks, political fetishes and humble chillies. And below you can find an example piece that dares you to think of a world where Kanye West has the keys to the White House…

President Kanye. The 45th President of the United States of America. Kanye West. Let that thought marinate for a moment, let the title roll around on your tongue as the absurdity of how genius it is dawns on you. Grows on you. Kanye West, heir supreme to all things creative, visionary and free. Kanye West, sculpture of culture and voice of the people. Kanye West, de facto leader of men, cappo di tutti capi – el Presidente.

But what policies will he fight for I hear you ask? When a man has 808s for a heartbeat and an autotuned soul, policies are just background noise. An afterthought. A fallen tree in an empty forest. Because what really matters, what America really needs, in fact what the world needs, is an individual with the self-belief, patriotism and sheer courage to stand in a crowded room and say no. To say this isn’t right. To gift his opponent the opportunity to finish, but to ultimately stand for justice and shout from the rafters: “Beyonce had the greatest video of all time”.

Because after all, is the world not currently spiralling from its axis anyway? Violence, corruption and Brexit reign supreme – but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. A flash of platinum, the sparkle of a diamond, the distinctive glisten of Rolex white gold in an otherwise hollow, darkened room. The man that stood against the tyranny of Taylor, a champion of truth. Yeezus.